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Tuesday, 18 May 2010

  • Not sure.....

    I am just not sure if what I am going to do is the right thing or not.

    I am going to get married and I should be happy about this, yet, despite having known my fiance almost our whole lives, I feel as though I do not know him at all. I know he cares for me and loves me, if he didn't, he would not be here. I am just not sure that either of us are REALLY ready to take such a drastic step.

    Simply, and rather bluntly, put, we are from two very different families and very different worlds. I finished college and now pull in the big bucks, he works at a fast food place and makes just enough to get by. My family gets along, for the most part, and respects one another. His family does not, and probably never will. I have a house, he has roommates and lives in a run down victorian house. He is a nerd in the gaming sense, I am more the bookish/useless information type.

    I willl never condemn him for the way he lives, because he does what he can with the money and resources he has. In fact i am a strong eliever that opposites attract. I can honestly say that it is never a dull moent with him. The thing that really throws a wrench in the whole thing for us is that we are unable to live together before our marriage. This was not a choice but a requirement by both our parents for the marriage to go through. To me this is a foolish idea because we will basically not really know much about eachothers everyday habits until AFTER we are married. I am not talking about the things we do as hobbies, I mean things like sleeping and eating habits, you know, that stuff.

    The main reason for this requirement was to keep us from repeating some of the things that my brother did. Suffice it to say her out the cart before the horse and had a kid before marriage and before he knew if he really loved the woman that he had the baby with. Thankfully it was a yes answer. I understand this reasoning fully and have no intentions of repeating it, but it seems to me that the parents lack faith in our ability to make decisions as adults.

    I guess time will tell whether this was a right decision or not. I really do love him, I am just scared that something will happen and we will not get married or be happy. I suppose such fears are normal and that, like most things, I am over-analyzing it.

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

  • RE: You don't look like a girl from A&F

    Link

    You know it really does astound me at the ignorance of some people. No, I am not refering to the OP or the girl in the story. I am refering to the people who are so blind and, quite frankly, uncultured to realize that having to wear a Hijab, or any head covering or religious "symbol", does not in any way shape or form mean that people would not wear clothing from a certain store. It also certaintly does not mean that they wouldn't try to work there, especially given the current status of the economy. Not to mention that there is wonderful thing called layering that allows people of modest faiths to buy from stores such as A&F and still be modest. Did no one stop to think that maybe this was one of the last places she had to look for a job? Granted, I don't care for them much, but beggars can't be choosers, and a job is a job, so if they were the only choice I would take the shot.

    Let me sink a few truths into your thick skulls. EVERY religion, and I do mean every single one, has some sort of text or "unspoken rules" about modesty. I find it funny that we are all so quick to jump on this girl for honoring a piece of her religion and wearing a head covering, yet we accept nuns who wear both modest habits and head coverings. We also say nothing about people who claim to be "conservative Christians" who believe in modesty, yet walk around with their pants pulled down past their knees or wear skirts/shorts so short that bending over is impossible. Where are the people chastizing them for claiming to be of a modest religious sect yet wear and buy clothing from stores such as A&F? Don't give me any of the "This is America and I can wear what I want" crap either, because I can easily counter that with, "This is America and she is also allowed to wear, work and believe what she wants."

    Whether we want to admit it or not, it all comes down to racism, cultural discrimination and a severe lack of understanding of the girls religion. We are happy to accept white Catholic nuns who wear habits and modest clothing and Christian teens who run around showing off everything, because as we all know they are completely normal and have never done anything to interfere with other religions or cultures or had extremeist groups in them. (Note the incredible use of sarcasm.)

    The fact of the matter is that if it were not for the general idea in American's heads that headwrap/Muslim/Islam equals terrorist, than we would not be having this conversation. I know this first hand as I have been known to wear a headwrap on occasion. I am neither Middle-Eastern or Muslim, I just like the no hassel feel and look to a head wrap. No matter how you look at it the girl was discriminated against because she was a Muslim. Not ony was what the store did incredibly illegal, but I am willing to venture a guess that if it had been a white girl with a head wrap on, she would have got the job, no questions asked.

Friday, 10 July 2009

Kirvi_Inci

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